okay.. so i wuz blogging last nite when everything i wuz typing went *poof!* and disappeared.. and me being tired and mostly lazy, i didn't bother retyping... but i guess i can give the point-forms of what i wuz bloggin/learning last nite.... it wuz based on this:
"Whoever tries to keep his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life will preserve it."
luke 17:33
Are you prepared to surrender totally and let go? The true test of abandonment or surrender is in refusing to say, "Well, what about this?" Beware of your own ideas and speculations. The moment you allow yourself to think, "What about this?" you show that you have not surrendered and that you do not really trust God. But once you do surrender, you will no longer think about what God is going to do. Abandonment means to refuse yourself the luxury of asking any questions. If you totally abandon yourself to God, He immediately says to you, "I will give your life to you as a prize . . . ."
my utmost for His highest
so yah... prettie self-explanatory... gotta give everything to Him. there are still a lotta things in life that i hold on to and try to do on my own.. which i know isn't the brightest thing to do... i guess i'm pretty dumb when it comes to things in life... i guess thaz where my "stupid sheep" side comes in... PRAISE GOD for being the Shepherd, showing me where to go... otherwise i'd like fall off a cliff or something.. =/ so yah... just learning i guess to give it up and wholly and completely leave it in His hands... been smacked a few timez here and there, but it's definitely good to hear God speak again. =)
okay.. so that wuz yesterday... today wuz really funnie too.. oh my goodness.. where to begin. okay... so last nite i wuz talking with a friend about the prospective coffeehouse we were gonna have at bci.. supposedly tmw.. but we ran into some problemz... not being able to find a supervisor and all, so we weren't even sure whether we were gonna have coffeehouse or not.. then all of a sudden our weekly/regular supervisor who at first said she wuz uncomfortable supervising an event like that apparently changed her mind... so here we go... everything wuz provided for and stuff.. but we were still kinda ill-prepped cuz everyone basically figured that it wouldn't happen if we didnt' find someone to supervise by the end of the week. so we have all the technicalities covered, but we didn't have a lotta stuff planned.. and though our teacher wuz okay with supervising the coffeehouse, she still didn't want it to be a really BIG event, and she wasn't too sure about having a speaker come in either. so that wuz the scenario and i wuz talkin to the other fellowship leader about it and he said that he thinkz we should push thru with it... me bein a l'il pessimistic thought we should post-pone it at least a week and let everyone get settled down and ready... i wuz just really uncertain whether we should push through it with or not.. cuz everything seems so disorganized...=/
then.. devos first thing this morning... oh my goodness... God's too funny...
Leave everything to Him and it will be gloriously and graciously uncertain how He will come in—but you can be certain that He will come. Remain faithful to Him.
my utmost for His highest
the whole devo was about uncertainty... and basically to stop trying to be certain about things in life.. whether they'll happen or not... and just be certain in one thing... God. when u're certain with God... it doesn't matter that u're not certain about everything else in life... because if u lift everything up to Him and let Him have some elbow-room to work, it's certain that He will work in HIS WAY.. not ours.. not the way we expect.. but the way He wants.... all we gotta do is remain faithful and honour Him in everything we do... after all, God is faithful to those who are faithful to Him and He honours those who honour Him... =) kinda scary when God speaks, but still prettie cool... so i believe we're having a "mini-coffeehouse" tmw... still a l'il unsure... but hey.. itz not about me... itz about God.
aside from that... i'm learning not to complain so much about the thingz in life that are crumby and stressing and "mah fan"... learning to glorify God in all that i do, and count my blessings... =) thaz basically it, i dun really have anything specific... just learning a lot... feel sorta like a sponge.. absorbing everything... =) why can't studying for tests be that easy? =D anywayz... final thoughts...
as children bring their broken toys
with tears for us to mend,
i brought my broken dreams to God
because He is my Friend.
but then instead of leaving Him
in peace to work alone,
i hung around and tried to help
with ways that were my own.
at last, i snatched them back and cried,
"how can You be so slow?"
"my child," He said, "what could I do?
you never did let go."
let go and let God
so yah... prettie self-explanatory... gotta give everything to Him. there are still a lotta things in life that i hold on to and try to do on my own.. which i know isn't the brightest thing to do... i guess i'm pretty dumb when it comes to things in life... i guess thaz where my "stupid sheep" side comes in... PRAISE GOD for being the Shepherd, showing me where to go... otherwise i'd like fall off a cliff or something.. =/ so yah... just learning i guess to give it up and wholly and completely leave it in His hands... been smacked a few timez here and there, but it's definitely good to hear God speak again. =)
okay.. so that wuz yesterday... today wuz really funnie too.. oh my goodness.. where to begin. okay... so last nite i wuz talking with a friend about the prospective coffeehouse we were gonna have at bci.. supposedly tmw.. but we ran into some problemz... not being able to find a supervisor and all, so we weren't even sure whether we were gonna have coffeehouse or not.. then all of a sudden our weekly/regular supervisor who at first said she wuz uncomfortable supervising an event like that apparently changed her mind... so here we go... everything wuz provided for and stuff.. but we were still kinda ill-prepped cuz everyone basically figured that it wouldn't happen if we didnt' find someone to supervise by the end of the week. so we have all the technicalities covered, but we didn't have a lotta stuff planned.. and though our teacher wuz okay with supervising the coffeehouse, she still didn't want it to be a really BIG event, and she wasn't too sure about having a speaker come in either. so that wuz the scenario and i wuz talkin to the other fellowship leader about it and he said that he thinkz we should push thru with it... me bein a l'il pessimistic thought we should post-pone it at least a week and let everyone get settled down and ready... i wuz just really uncertain whether we should push through it with or not.. cuz everything seems so disorganized...=/
then.. devos first thing this morning... oh my goodness... God's too funny...
the whole devo was about uncertainty... and basically to stop trying to be certain about things in life.. whether they'll happen or not... and just be certain in one thing... God. when u're certain with God... it doesn't matter that u're not certain about everything else in life... because if u lift everything up to Him and let Him have some elbow-room to work, it's certain that He will work in HIS WAY.. not ours.. not the way we expect.. but the way He wants.... all we gotta do is remain faithful and honour Him in everything we do... after all, God is faithful to those who are faithful to Him and He honours those who honour Him... =) kinda scary when God speaks, but still prettie cool... so i believe we're having a "mini-coffeehouse" tmw... still a l'il unsure... but hey.. itz not about me... itz about God.
aside from that... i'm learning not to complain so much about the thingz in life that are crumby and stressing and "mah fan"... learning to glorify God in all that i do, and count my blessings... =) thaz basically it, i dun really have anything specific... just learning a lot... feel sorta like a sponge.. absorbing everything... =) why can't studying for tests be that easy? =D anywayz... final thoughts...
with tears for us to mend,
i brought my broken dreams to God
because He is my Friend.
but then instead of leaving Him
in peace to work alone,
i hung around and tried to help
with ways that were my own.
at last, i snatched them back and cried,
"how can You be so slow?"
"my child," He said, "what could I do?
you never did let go."
let go and let God